Friday, July 23, 2010

Gregory Suede


Gregory Suede

Gregory suede original inventor of the BluBlocker

what can you say about Gregory suede that wouldn't sound like an exaggerated fib

but in all truth he's a kind man, somewhat of an alcoholic and marijuana abuser, but still always carries a kind word for anyone passing by. He lives in the Bahamas, you all know where.
he lives in a private loft/villa style house by the point of the beach, lots of windows.

you see Mr. Suede believes in voyeurism and exhibitionism.. He "lets it all into his life." as he is often quoted as saying.

That may be one reason he rarely wears any kind of shirt ... No usually you'll see him in short shorts, a beach hat, some slip on's some crazy funky necklace and his signature blublockers.
he loves those things
in fact he never removes them.
the only thing he loves more then his blublockers is his manly bear beard that he strokes when in deep contemplation.
no one lives near him .. his land is rather large. its for the best anyway he plays loud 80's and techno music and plays that darn didgeridoo of his.
you see him at the local bar .. the crocodile tub.. its a martini bar for tourist but he's always there, martini or scotch in hand.
you know they let him smoke his weed inside now !
talk about a good customer



you also see him walking in town, no shirt on.. buying food or premium beer, charming the tourists.. he's rather well spoken, reserved in words but each sentence that comes out of his mouth has been magnificently gilded and delivered with precision.

He's quite rich, but lives relatively cheap, save for the extravagant expense here and there

Mr. Suede barely works, a couple phone calls and emails a day and the business is settled

a hearty breakfast and a cup of the finest Colombian java and his work is done before the Sunrises and when it does the cling of ice cubes on a glass or the spark of a match is soon to follow

His favorite hobby though (besides drinking, flirting and dancing) is hacky sac and surfing.. he'll spend dawn to dusk at the beach surfing and hackying.. usually welcomes the sun rise with some vintage bottle he's acquired. It would not be so wrong to call Mr. Suede a bottle collector he has some f the finest scotches and whiskeys from around the world, the problem is those bottle rarely stay full for long. he'll have a drink with the sun rise and hack the sac, all while holding his drink in one hand.. some have even witnessed him surfing with a drink in hand. The only thing harder to get out of his hand is those blublockers.

Mr. Suede is always having a good time.

you really have to be able to enjoy your own company if you can have dance parties at your mansion by yourself.. and we all know that with a drop of a hat his home would overflow with people for one of his famous parties.
I even heard that that Pegasus Valentine guy.. the rich socialite from Amsterdam comes to his parties.

i think one year someone got him some socks and shirts for his birthday as a joke and he used the socks as a head band and the shirt as a capes.. there are times when Mr. Suede is obliged to wear a shirt, when he goes on a business trip or some such thing.. but the most buttons anyone has every seen button on him has been 4, i heard it was on a skip trip in the alps
when he goes to a fashion show in a big city, another one of his pastimes, he'll button 1 or 2.. you can see how important Mr.Suede finds an occasion n the mainland by the number of buttons he's got buttoned

oh boy you hear how crazy it gets when he gets off that island and goes to rave in the big cities.. i heard shit gets wild.. it's a rare occasion but when you hear Gregory Suede's going be at a party or festival rave thing then you make sure to go to that party.
and you can always spot him out.. he'll be wearing his blublockers, a little hat, a big beard and a drink and or thin joint in his hand. He'll be dancing away a storm or chatting up the bartender girls, because they're the hardest ones to flirt with apparently, he always leaves the party with the prettiest and most interesting looking girls. Mr. Suede once said that the most attractive women are the one's that are trying something different.

he has an air of joyful nonchalance.. like everything is going perfectly well and will continue on forever

he's shared a number of drinks and doobs with the strangest people, celebrities, rock stars, his mail man, Muammar Gaddafi, he got high with the cheerleaders and mascot of the New England Patriots and it was caught on camera! Mr. Suede could convince anyone to relax, have a drink or a smoke and just "enjoy it all."


"would you care to Puff a Piff" he always says

oh man he's enjoying life that Gregory Suede .. if you're looking to relax then take a chapter out of his book and enjoy a summers day , no shirts aloud, sunglasses a must, good music, a good substance at hand, short shorts, comfortable shoes and a stroll through the neighborhood

As Gregory Suede would say " The world is just one big party, don't be afraid to have fun"



Tuesday, July 20, 2010

rock and roll ?

yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo yo rococo rococo rococo

i've started to get into ROCK N' ROLL!

check this shiz out



and this





Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Hagakure




I'm reading Hagakure "The book of the Samurai" by Yamamoto Tsunetomo

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hagakure


this book is a collection of thoughts and ideals of a samurai

this particular passage pertains to me right now

"in affaires like law suits or even in arguments, by losing quickly one will lose in fine fashion. it is ike Sumo wrestling.
if one thinks only of winning, a sordid victory will be worse that defeat."

READ HAGAKURE!

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

he fell for her




you fell for her feller
and it was youthful bliss perpetuating epiphanies
and oh boy did you smile , and she smiled
you bought 2 tickets for that roller coaster called love
you bought those highs and low's


I've been down that road brother, i've taken that hellish boat ride
Love takes you to the wildest places, but remember your never alone..
you got your homies your brothers your dogs and shit i'm sorry if i sound gangster but shit this is some hard core stuff
love is picking and choosing the things you like in a person and just like inny-minny-miniy-mo you never know what your gonna get

nigger please your a dragon... dragons don't bleed tears they fly high breathing thier fire down on your face..
and just because this particular evening my poetry is out of whack doesn't mean my message is not as strong. i don't need simile and metaphors to tell my homie that he's a GREAT mutha fucking man and ya girls makes guys cry but that's life and your not less of a man for it !
when i was told I'd get over it i never believed them.... that notion was whack!
but that shit dissipates like diffusion and just like your glass of water you call "who you are" that drop of blood stays solid for a bit but slowly dissipates through your being, your glass of water and it will always be there but it will slowly be less and less present
remember every tear home boy
get stronger with every one you shed
this is life
your strong
your stronger then most and your a king
feel that shit!
you eat Epic for breakfast
live and learn
romance 101
and you just passed with an A+

Monday, July 5, 2010

My Blog has a crush on your blog

I check your blog a lot.. sometimes daily.. mostly daily...
I dig what you have to say
your a silly goose!
i love silly geese
sometimes i feel bad that i don't post as much as you do .. but wtv my blog isn't a twitter account.. I'm glad yours is though

One day our blogs will make sweet love to each other and you will be shocked that you haven't done it sooner


Aren't crushes just the BEST!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

THAT'S MY SONG!

I went to BlueDog on Friday night
it was so much fun... dancing.. drinking
my friend Justin Adler is the resident Dj at Bluedog on Friday
when he dropped this track: Bingo Players - Tom's Diner
i flipped my shit and yelled out as loud and as drunk as i could "SHHHIIIITTTT THATS MY SONG!"

this song is also bomb:
Waiworinao - Ricardo Villalobos

Furthermore this is the best German radio show i know: http://www.radioblau.de/index.php?z=ar14

I met an amazing German man named Patrick Loos in India.. he has a show on this station... check it out!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

sometimes i Love to talk out loud in a black girls voice




this evening i decided to treat myself.

my master plan for my soiree with will would be the following: getting a hot fudge Sunday at the local ice cream shop, then smoke a bowl at the park, and come home to watch Red Cliff

as i was leaving my father wanted to come with or for me to get him an ice cream. now i blew that off ..cause hey ..i wanna smoke a bowl.
so as i took the lovely 5 minute stroll to the ice cream shop i thought to myself that i should not be selfish! nay i should go get my ice cream, smoke a bowl in the park, then get my dad an ice cream.
Yes! easy, and good karma.

i proceeded to order my hot fudge Sunday with ease, consume it in the lovely bike park, smoke a sweet bowl and walk back to the ice cream shop.

i called my dad as i walked over and asked him what he wanted?
probably vanilla, or chocolate ..perhaps both i thought
he pronounced in excited glee that he wanted butterscotch or caramel
well wait that fucks things up.. that's more complicated.. i didn't sign up for this, i pondered.
no worries it really wasn't a big deal.
as i stood in line progressively getting higher from the magnificent bowl of magic i had smoked 5 minutes prior, i thought about how i was going to order this "butterscotch caramel" do they even have it i thought.
a lovely young girl came to take my order, innocent as rose pettles, no older then 17. her breasts deliciously plump, she was no athlete .. she did enjoy indulging her taste buds. she was not incredibly plump, just as plump as a 17 year-old book worm straigh A student who has no time for physical activity would be.
she greeted me hurriedly leaning forward to save time from my order to the ice cream bar behind her.
i saw a glorious valley of flesh so tiny, squeezed between two mountainous breasts
right as i was going to deliever my well crafted question about the butterscotch another ice cream wench bumped into her.
thier shoulders did not meet, nay, the introduers shoulder bumped squarly into the beautiful tata's of my server.
they giggled more then jello during an earth quake, i felt like i was watching a fat man get shot
my jaw parted in a slow silent cry, the O of my lips expanding slow like the matrix
as the tremendous event had passed and the boob earthquake had stopped the girl looked me in the eyes forcing me for an answer
my eyes and entire head did a quick shake as if i fly had flow onto my nose
my voice was eviscerated in my throat, and all that came out was a low bass AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH ending with my question i had lost
taduavcaramel
i said
she looked confused and asked me what i wanted, leaning forward to hear better
one hand covering her chest
"est-ce-que t'a du butterscotch?"
she motioned for me to come with her to the other side of the bar where the caramel was,
yes that's what i wanted indeed!
"one scoop?" she asked in french
she put one scoop, stopping to make sure i was certain.
yes yes i was
but wait i wonder how much it costs for 2?, and it's a 5 minute walk back home it might melt
"non! 2 boule!"

boule means boobs it can also mean ball as in scoop of ice cream

Monday, June 7, 2010

i have stories....

Here are the titles of some of my adventures in Inida thus far:

-seeing through trees
-greeny transportation
-the sacking of dehli..belly
-no cake birthday girl
-slaying of the she-bitches
-I do P.P.
-deceptive snake charmer
-giving head to sow
-inner kung fu
-earless servants vulgar manner
-charlie
-60 year old hippie orgy
-hippie witch of the forest
-french hash snobs
-Big Boss lady hands
-Johnny djembe
-Swiss drunkards (he was a good fighter)
-indie acid dave
-Bj barbara jane
-Defensive hindu hard head
-full power hike
-spider slaying
-Himalayan sandals
-hacket the game
-isreali smokers
-gangster rooftop hindu chill outs
-dark jam's at welcome
-Big Ass Sikhs
-Israeli's throw rocks at each other
-lazy day dogs, nighttime hell hounds
-street kids want your beer
-eye fucking the Indian way
-buses hull ass, ours tighten
-shaky Gary joint roller
-japanese back packers
-gay german hikers
-don't use napkin for toilet
-Bholanath
-scary British junky girl
-lalu and ajay
-golden temple smells like feet
-danny Auschwitz smoking dojo
-we can make mustaches
-pervert painter full power
-Vikki loves us boys
-Katy tarrot card
-metal rave wasted sadu's
-don't feed the puppy
-Long Mornings
-boulder coaches
-first customer we have chai
-meeting the wives and the family
-Raju!
-Riding the Chillum Train
-Gill army toker
-reiki amir giggle pants ..and shit
-Rizen shwanz
-foreign fruits make good chillum's
-no mo momo
- we go to tosh tomorrow

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

India

just finished packing for my trip to India!
it's gona be crazy!

my bag weights 25 lbs

my smile weights more