The First Time

it was like "look at how magnificent the world can be"
and i felt it.. it was intense at first, i wasn't sure i could take it, i sat down.
but after those faithful words that were repeated to me by a wise man full of youth i understood.
you know the words
embeded in my reality my lexicon my way of life.
and as i was coming up, ridding the pink unicorn of pleasure and possibilities... i saw.
and i smiled
oh boy did i smile
the energy itself would suffice for a good high, a pleasant trip
oh wow i wish i could charge you with a fraction of this playa energy
it was something like nothing i had ever experienced
so much joy concentrated in one place beat me to a pulp
and i inhaled it,
i rode that pink unicorn hard the world in slow motion my happiness exponentially expanding from within me to the tips of my thoughts
i was content with the world, the sand at my feet, the beat of my heart
it was electrifying
i stood
my golden bejeweled spandex leggings sparkling magic in the darkness of the out door rave. they were borrowed, like so many things , like the land that was being beaten by my tapping feet, like the air that i breathed in and exhaled fire from the dj booth
the reno thrift store tie dangling from my head like a bandanna of 'fuck you society, i'll flash your republicans and ass smack your conservatives"
the shirt i wore, silk screened with the words "Daft Punk" made by me, me and an old friend who is off on his own journey
the sister shirt somewhere in his closet
the smiles of the thousands of people around me, dancing, they were the safety nets to this particular pink unicorn trip, even if i fell off i would fall in an endless sea of smiles
and wow was that reassuring
providing my own floating device from my lips
dancing the 4 of us
wise man full of youth head bald filled with a sea of knowledge flowing from his long blond locks, and why did he care for a kid half his age who started off cold? did he really need to give me his down jacket as my feathers were ruffled in my current state of consciousness, nay, but he did, and i flew , those feathers flying me back on the pink unicorn
a girl with a smile to out smile all the playa people so glad
oh so glad
her friend, she lent me those leggings, she danced belly Hindu sensuality as i sat awed by life
kissing me candy lips giving me the cpr of pleasure making sure i was always breathing joy
making my face and loins smile like dancing hippies the 70's was just a decade dude
the best time i ever had
surrounded by so much joy that it was indecipherable like Egyptian hieroglyphs .. where did it end , where did it begins inside all of us
and as the police strolled through the crowds looking for trouble like bullies on the play ground i shielded myself with 2 fingers shaped V reminiscent of 20-30-40 year old protests
and when the dancing was over we walked to the edge of the desert, sat down , 3 new friends among us, a 50 odd ball biker artist, who has touched all of you with his Disney collaborations 3 sons 3 mothers .. his stories were enthralling, a too-smart-for-his-own-good asain boy from orange county who studied and went to raves, combining those A's with lots of E, and some drunk texan ex marine freshly kicked out for burning forbidden twigs in his mouth wearing his birthday suit save some boxers
we watched the sun rise , great ball of flaming passion we let the sound of its beauty pierce our eyes and play us toons
and that was the first time i tried ecstasy

great music from great men

courtesy of Joshua carry, one of the best story tellers i know











courtesy of Tom Sullivan, the most Canadian mofo i know!



Courtesy of Brendhan the champion party animal


he plays with his five fingers yo!

if you embrace this then Ah yes, you will feel at peace friend , instead of feeling in peaces

if for some untold reason a friend, a good friend, would sleep with one of my ex's
well then
instead of brewing anger in cauldrons of discontent i would simply step aside and bow to the powers of karma, to the mysticism of 'what goes around comes around'
i would chuckle and point my friend in the right direction, "south is where YOU want to go friend"
a sordid feeling of ownership PLAGUES the men of this world. "SHE'S MINE! I SLEPT WITH HER! NO ONE CAN HAVE HER"

ah but how you hurt yourself you foolish fiend of ownership.
she is not yours, she is no ones, she belongs to the universe, just like we, created from stardust, were once suns and stars.

can anyone truly own a star?
nay
this world, this energy, each one of us is in constant motion, dancing with the Wu Li Masters.
dancing the meaning of life
and maybe Patrick is the only friend i have who would consider this obtuse view on reality
did you ever learn where GOLD came from?
ahh now theres a mind boggling factoid
look it up
and consider
if gold comes from the collapsing stars then where do we come from?
back to the Ex's, we label them so.
X marks the spot, marks the end
they also mark treasure maps, and just because you've plundered, hopefully learned, and moved on does not mean that no one else can discover the secrets found under that X
so do not be jealous when word spreads like wild fire that someone you use to fuck, someone you might have loved is dancing the dance of meaning with another man or women. we are hear to learn ladies and gentlemen, and if you treat your sexual and emotional endeavors like textbooks then jealousy might crumple away like old pages, do you not give your books away? or do you keep them dusty on your book shelf.. a prize on your mantle?
re opeing them from time to time to try and find the joy you use to have when you originally flipped through their chapters.

LET GO!

they are no longer yours and you are no longer there's, 2 divided by 2 equals 1 !
and as i have preached before we are all on a journey, and you can only learn so much from one book, one human being!


take a deep breath, listen to the drone of this Gothic singers, raise your gaze and baptize yourself in this new knowledge, going forth with a smile, a walking stick and a yearning to LEARN!
FUCKING LEARN!
we must learn!
we must experience and see new places, meet new people, test yourself

think of it as school as getting your bachelors, but your getting your degree on the world
write essays of the mind, orals deep conversation, group projects with new friends
and mid terms re-assessing your life
go to Jerusalem go to Peru, go to Scotland, go to France, go to china go to Russia
imagine the wealth of knowledge

in Australia there is such a thing called a 'walk-about' where one will walk for days surviving on his or her own, discovering themselves... do this on a grand scale, this is your life!
imagine sitting down for tea with EVERY SINGLE HUMAN BEING ON THIS EARTH
all 6.45 billion of them
what would they tell you?
shit empathize
think of your mind as a vast library just waiting for new books to fill its vast hallways
do you not want to experience?
do you not want to let others experience?
and if everything you touched or saw or learned was exclusively yours, then no one would learn at all
so let it go, let what you have experienced pass on to other eyes and hands.
you might have loved her, or him, but do not put shackles on their exploration, on YOUR exploration
find joy in the fact that they are improving themselves by experience new things and new people
if you embrace this then Ah yes, you will feel at peace friend , instead of feeling in peaces
feel your ridiculous cares,fears,worry dissolve into the atmosphere
feel a warm love cover you like a multi colored tapestry of beauty
hopefully this silly boys speal will make you appreciate the sparkle in a strangers eyes
we are all humans and compared with the vastness of the universe we are but ants, watch a colony of ants walk in every direction across your driveway.. searching for something
and that's what we are
star dust ants dancing with the wu li masters in this ballroom we call reality, each expressing their own meaning of life,

given the chance, i would drink tea with you all

we are lions

Dexplicit - Machine man
Dexplicit - The Alien
La Roux vs. Little boots - stuck on the kill


we are wolves
we are lions
we are cunning carnivores cocky kids looking for cunt
always on the prowl look for fresh meat, because it's all about the kill
it's about the pack, it's about the pride, its about marking our territory and constantly looking for more. we smile with only hints of our canines. we don't have your best interest in mind. we will run you down, ambush you, corner you, bleed you out till you have no more fight left to fend us off succumbing to our bites and growls.
will invite you into our den, glimpses of our heart. and wow that's shinny. showing our weakness, because aren't weakness attractive. but only teeth and claws lie behind those shinny hearts and awe's.

we are animals, everyone is an animal, the difference is we have chosen to hunt, instead of being hunted. it's a dog eat dog world out there and if your not biting your getting bitten .

we have banded together, strength in numbers.
not all the same, different breeds of claws and teethes, strength in variety. Lions tigers and bears oh my, that makes one hell of a pride you can't out run a cheetah, out wrestle a bear, out think a lion. out there in the wild you'll only notice the ones who choose to be seen, the ones with the Big manes the flashy coats, it's all for the team, and while your dazed by the way we boast one of us will pounce and babe your toast. we sacrifice for each other, if one is fed then rest will endure.

ya we have a hierarchy, the alpha's eat before the beta's and that don't cause no vendetta, just respect. and some of us can be fed on a few pecks. our appetite not always voracious cause some of us like quality over quantity so watch out if your bodacious.

you can believe we stalk, circling, looking for weakness... everyone has a weakness. just because your a doe eyed tough chick with a big rack, long hair and totally stacked doesn't mean you can take all of us. your either strong, fast or cunning, rarely all 3 some are 2 , those ones are fun, one way or another your going down... on one of us. all we gotta do is match the predator to the prey.

we come from behind, some of us aggressive enough to come from the front, in plain sight, mocking you with your impending doom. sully wully the hyena laughing disgust dripping from his jaws
ya you'll find us in the same place most of time. figured out our goals, our hunger.
well shit now its time to move on. we have hunted this watering hole dry. all that's left are the weak and inebriated and how easy is it to take down a weak kneed slam pig smelling of mead.
it's time for bigger prey.
its time we organize our hunt.
we are bears hear us roar for rory
we are hyena's, hear us laugh for sully
we are panthers, hear us growl for tom
we are wolves hear us howl for drew
we are tigers hear us roar for will
we are caracal's hear us hiss for harry
we are wolverines hear us growl for brendhan
WE ARE LIONS!

Brendhan

do you fuck a slut even if you knwo she's a slut?
11:20pmWill

depends

is she hot and interesting
11:20pmBrendhan

she goes to my school arts college, so that covers interesting, and id say 8

she's 18 though....

that's young for me

I know I can

but I dont know if I shoudl
11:21pmWill

so she is hot, she is interesting, she is an artist and it seems she is exploring her sexuallity

what is wrogn with that, if anythign she is doing what we all should do
11:21pmBrendhan

i agree
11:22pmWill

is she a slut or does she relaize that sex is a zesty enterprise with quite the profitable return

i say enoy it

she wont fall in lobve with you and neither should u fall for her

you should celebrate your sexuality with her
11:23pmBrendhan

i like it
11:24pmWill

oh you willbecause when it boils down to it we are animals, animals who fight our carnal pleasures so as to confrom with our fucking goodie 2 shoes society ..... i say fuck it i say fuck i say fuck with abandon
11:25pmBrendhan

i like it all
11:26pmWill

indeed
11:26pmBrendhan

my goal this year is to hit 15

I completed #11

I need 4 more

and the criteria is new vaginas

not ones i'd revisited earlier
11:27pmWill

fucllkkk sll a7
11:28pmWill

i'mm still at 7 but i have a high gpa (girl point average) quality over quantity but yes my goal is 10.. i might move to the british virgin isladns with drew and work at a resort.. i'm sure i'd boost my numbers there .. but will see .. for now it is hard when u live with your parents
11:28pmBrendhan

agree

i slow down in the summer cause im at home with my paretns but really i shoudl be kicking it up
11:29pmWill

dude ifi ad my own place

destruction
11:30pmBrendhan

7 is a legit number
11:30pmWill

i suppose i only lost my v a couple months beofre i was 18

but regardless

i want more sex, so i can grow
11:30pmBrendhan

true
11:31pmWill

this plant needs water

Brendhan

hahah

its a hard arena

some are good lucking but suck in the sack

any combination
11:32pmWill

word, i vow that next starfish i get i'm first goign to try and encourage movement and if she still dosen't show signs of life i will leave right in the middle
11:32pmBrendhan

i've quit
11:32pmWill

i have had many starfishes, only 1 or 2 great in be
11:32pmBrendhan

i've faked one

to get out
11:32pmWill

lol!

like seinfeild
11:33pmBrendhan

its easier with a condom on

you just pretend and throw it away fast
11:33pmWill

haha

see thats kinda sad though... bithces need to get there game togther
11:34pmBrendhan

theres been times where ive drank too much and havent been able to finish
11:34pmWill

lol
11:34pmBrendhan

theres been times i havent finished because they suck and imake them go longer just to make them feel shame
11:34pmWill

!

amazing
11:35pmBrendhan

teachable moments as president obama calls them

New Gf

hey so ya i totally ditched that black girl.. she was cwrazyyyy

this is my new gf
...
i don't think her parents approve of me but that's cool

she's my little middle eastern but i'm mostly down south
her eyes look even nicer then they are when they are looking up at me from my tropic of Capricorn

so i just finished watching season 1 of 'Skins' that crazy British sitcom about those wild teens doing drugs and partying and , well, living
i realized i haven't been in love for a very, very long time

like that silly love where you hold hands and say 'hi' a lot

anyway.. poem for another time ya?